Time for a reality check.

Ever find youself trying to figure out what's going on? I know I do. I'll feel like everything is on cruise control and then, BANG!, something stops my flow. It could be anything- a bad day, an unkind word, anything.

In these moments we have two choices- put up or shut up. We can buckle down and do what we need to to get back on track or we can do nothing and play "the victim" to whatever circumstance has derailed us.

So what to do? It's time for a reality check. We ARE (Even if it doesn't feel like it) in control of our circumstances. We may not like the choices available but we always have a choice. So put forth the effort to exercise said control and make it happen.

It is never enough to just shut-up, suck it up, or allow our circumstances to wash over us. We are all very powerful women- even if we try to refuse that we are. We are all remarkable in our own right- even if we feel as if we're boxing with giants. We are all fully capable of creating the reality we wish to have- even if others try to convince us otherwise.

It is our right, no-our responsibility- to step up and live our best life. We owe it to ourselves to do so.

Happy Hump Day!

Love Always,
Reyna

Time to have a heart to heart

I was lucky enough to spend today with my bestie. She know me better than I know myself and over several cups of diner coffee we just talked. She cradled my child as if she were her own and listened. I lazily stirred my coffee and listened. The give and take of a conversation with someone who is generally interested can make us take a good look at who we are and what we're about. In the moments where I listened, I heard myself speaking in her words. The fears, concerns, daily minutia that comprise our days flowed from her lips and resonated in my heart and mind. In the moments when I spoke I saw pure understanding as she listened.

How often do we allow ourselves those moments of blissful release? The opportunity to just talk with no fear, no worry, to a person who understands us better that we do ourselves. Probably not as often as we should. Instead we bottled it up, let it linger, and finally channel that frustration into unhealthy outlets, whatever form that may take.

So what should we do about that? If you find yourself alone, write it out. Reach out and find someone who you know could become that sounding board for you. Stretch yourself and leave your comfort zone. To trust another is to truly love yourself.

So this week I challenge you to have a conversation about everything and nothing, about highs and lows, about life and what we call life.

Trust me- it's the most refreshing thing you'll do.

Love Always,
Reyna

Who's on first?

We are all familiar with the Abbott and Costello comedy sketch. Here's a quick recap: a bunch of ball players have demonstrative adjectives as names leading to mass confusion. Hilarity ensues. End scene.

This got me to thinking- how many things in our lives cause confusion, doubt, and general unhappiness because we don't "name" it as precisely as we should?

Follow me on this one- it's 5 pm. Your day sucked and that box of cookies looks realy good so you eat it. Were you hungry? Probably not. But in this instance, what we should have named "frustration" we named "hunger" and dealt with the wrong emotion.

Here's another- You've just worked all day. You're tired, possibly cranky, and ready to relax when you get home. Once you arrive home, nothing's been done. Dishes are in the sink, dinner needs to be made, clutter is everywhere! You have to do it all so you do. Once done, you reward yourself with that triple chocolate chunk cookie figuring that you earned it. Were you hungry? Nope, but in this instance you've named "frustration" or "exhaustion" as "hunger" and dealt with the wrong emotion.

So what to do? The obvious answer is to think before we act. Make sure we're dealing with the actual emotion we're feeling in that time. But often that doesn't happen so we need to develop a stop-gap measure. For me, it's to write down what I'm going to eat before I eat. This means I have to find a pen, my journal or a piece of paper, a surface to lean on, etc. If I'm not really hungry, well by this point I don't feel like going through the hassle.

So my challenge to you this week is to check your emotions before you act. If you think you're angry, make sure you're really angry. If you think you're hungry, make sure you're really hungry.

There's no need to waste precious time on vague emotions. No need to wonder "Who's on First?"

Love always,
Reyna